In the early 90s, The Independent used to run a writing competition in its Saturday magazine. Because I was out of work (it was the height of the recession), I had plenty of time on my hands. So I used to enter it on a regular basis, and I actually won a prize a couple of times. Of course, just as I was getting into my stride, they went and stopped the competition. Swine.

This was the brief for the first one:

IndyComp1

and here was my entry:

IndyWinner1

This was the brief for the second one:

IndyComp2

and here was my entry:

IndyWinner2

By the way, the champagne and olive oil were both excellent.