Kk'Ekk - Revision history

Jonathan at 22:48, 28 May 2011

2011-05-28T22:48:00Z

Jonathan: /* Further reading */

2011-05-22T17:22:44Z

Jonathan at 17:21, 22 May 2011

2011-05-22T17:21:15Z

Jonathan at 17:18, 22 May 2011

2011-05-22T17:18:02Z

Jonathan: /* Noted kk’Ekk speakers */

2011-05-22T16:35:38Z

Noted kk’Ekk speakers

Jonathan at 16:20, 22 May 2011

2011-05-22T16:20:07Z

Jonathan: /* Further reading */

2011-05-22T16:14:07Z

Jonathan: /* Further reading */

2011-05-22T16:13:50Z

Jonathan: Created page with "{tentacles} kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is..."

2011-05-22T16:10:38Z

Created page with "{tentacles} kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is..."

New page

{tentacles}

kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.

==Grammar==

kk’Ekk is massively hypertonal, sharing many common elements with languages such as Mandarin Chinese. However, the number of tones is considerably higher, with some estimates reaching as many as two and a half thousand.

Thus, the simple phrase:

:'''Ek – ek – ek – ekekekekek!'''

means “That shade of beige works wonders for your waistline”, whereas:

:'''Ek – ek – ek – ekekekekek!'''

means “I have lately developed a particular fondness for the texture of latex.” Moreover,

:'''Ek – ek – ek – ekekekekek!'''

means “I will do anything you want as long as you wash that thing first”. And so on, for a further two thousand or so other alternatives.

==The Murgatroyd question==

It will therefore be seen that the possibilities for misunderstanding are practically limitless, leading to the many wars in which kk’Ekk speakers have become embroiled. A team of software developers have been working for many years on a program to facilitate automatic translation, but the results are patchy, to say the least. A recent study showed that any random piece of English text fed into the latest version, and then recursively retranslated back to English eventually stabilises to the phrase:

:'''Ekekekek – ek – ek – ek – ekky – ekky – ek!'''

or

:Grab my arm, Murgatroyd, the pancakes are dancing a tango!

No-one has yet established who Murgatroyd is, although persistent speculation points towards the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince_Albert_Victor,_Duke_of_Clarence_and_Avondale Duke of Clarence].

==Examples of kk’Ekk==

Further examples of kk’Ekk may be read [[Wickhampedia:warning1|here]]. However, potential readers should be warned that having read the above four phrases, they are already close to the European recommended daily limit calculated using the refined Bergen-op-Zoom protocol.

==Noted kk’Ekk speakers==

kk’Ekk is a notoriously difficult, not to say dangerous language to master. Over the years, however, a number of individuals have succeeded in achieving a passable level of proficiency, including George Wickham, the celebrated alien hunter and several members of the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_icke British royal family].

==Further reading==

*[[The Safer Oxford kk’Ekk-English Dictionary]]
*[[Drop Your kk’Ekks!, A Compendium of Tradtional Dirty kk’Ekk Songs]]
*[[Missing Murgatroyd – In Pursuit of the kk’Ekk Singularity]]
*Smith, Eric k'k. [[kk’Ekking Hell – My Life as a kk’Ekk translator]]

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 {{tentacles}}
-kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Afrikaans. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.
+'''kk’Ekk''' is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Afrikaans. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.
 ==Grammar==

@@ Line 46: / Line 46: @@
 *[[Drop Your kk’Ekks!  A Compendium of Tradtional Dirty kk’Ekk Songs]]. Earfinger Broadsides, 2006.
 *Nurdle, Prof. A. [[Missing Murgatroyd – In Pursuit of the kk’Ekk Singularity]]. Wiley, 2007.
-*Smith, Eric k'k. [[kk’Ekking Hell – My Life as a kk’Ekk translator]]. Quikbuk Press, 2010.
+*Smith, E. k'E. [[kk’Ekking Hell – My Life as a kk’Ekk translator]]. Quikbuk Press, 2010.

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 {{tentacles}}
-kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.
+kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Afrikaans. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.
 ==Grammar==
@@ Line 39: / Line 39: @@
 ==Noted kk’Ekk speakers==
-kk’Ekk is a notoriously difficult, not to say dangerous language to master. Over the years, however, a number of individuals have succeeded in achieving a passable level of proficiency, including George Wickham, the celebrated alien hunter, and several members of the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_icke British royal family].
+kk’Ekk is a notoriously difficult, not to say dangerous language to master. Over the years, however, a number of individuals have succeeded in achieving a passable level of proficiency, including [[George Wickham]], the celebrated alien hunter, and several members of the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_icke British royal family].
 ==Further reading==

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:20, 22 May 2011
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	kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.		kk’Ekk is one of the pan-generic Wakkofenic languages (on the right anterior branch), and as such has much in common with kl’Aaaaak, kr’uuurgh and Welsh. It is doubly-ideomorphic in the modified Bayes sense, meaning that if spoken aloud too frequently it can cause the speaker to develop tentacles. This Wickhampedia entry should therefore be handled with extreme care, especially by readers who are unable to stop their lips moving when processing a section of text.

@@ Line 44: / Line 44: @@
 *[[The Safer Oxford kk’Ekk-English Dictionary]]. OUP, 12th Edition, 2009.
-*[[Drop Your kk’Ekks!,  A Compendium of Tradtional Dirty kk’Ekk Songs]]. Earfinger Broadsides, 2006.
+*[[Drop Your kk’Ekks!  A Compendium of Tradtional Dirty kk’Ekk Songs]]. Earfinger Broadsides, 2006.
 *Nurdle, Prof. A. [[Missing Murgatroyd – In Pursuit of the kk’Ekk Singularity]]. Wiley, 2007.
 *Smith, Eric k'k. [[kk’Ekking Hell – My Life as a kk’Ekk translator]]. Quikbuk Press, 2010.

@@ Line 35: / Line 35: @@
 ==Examples of kk’Ekk==
-Further examples of kk’Ekk may be read [[Wickhampedia:warning1|here]]. However, potential readers should be warned that having read the above four phrases, they are already close to the European recommended daily limit calculated using the refined Bergen-op-Zoom protocol.
+Further examples of kk’Ekk may be read [[Wickhampedia:warning1|here]]. However, potential readers should be warned that having read the above four phrases, they are already close to the European recommended daily limit calculated using the [[refined Bergen-op-Zoom protocol]].
 ==Noted kk’Ekk speakers==